Throughout my life I have searched for female role models that suit my eccentries and exemplify the gentle balance of power with femininity, healing, receptivity and vision in a way that feels true to my soul.
In college the model I chose for my bachelors thesis in religion was Hildegard von Bingen, noted as one of the key female mystics, a woman who deeply shaped her culture from Bingen, Germany.
Yesterday I sent my father a googlemap and asked him to point out where I was conceived. In Finthen, just outside Mainz and less than 10 miles from Bingen — I could see on the googlemap the road that goes straight from Hildegard’s world into mine. Going there seems so close now.
This excited me SO MUCH, to feel a sense of connection with an elder that feels as kindred as her words have often been to me. Hildegard felt her strongest epiphany at age 42 and spent her last 40+ years building her community around that vision, publishing books on green medicine and theology that included her art and music. Her songs are still performed today, her work is known worldwide as the precursor to Gregorian chants. Her Scivias are still sung in the Latin she learned from the Abbess Jutta as a child.
Now when I go to practice the theremin it does not feel like a foolish endeavor. We are making music to change ideas.
Music and video is a tremendous allegory for the collaborate artmaking experience so many of us long for. HUMANS LOVE TO CREATE TOGETHER! It’s true in theatre, on stage with a band, at home working in Second Life with a dozen avatars or in the editing room with a film team. There’s a special alchemy created when we commit to this experience as a whole.
Hildegard’s order was strong and separate from men yet she worked at equal level with church leaders….she understood too acutely the weakness of her sexuality and yet she made sure that she was heard by any leader who dared to spew injustice in her direction. I do not feel like a weak woman, and yet I sometimes pass the jar off to my husband’s stronger arms. He passes the social calendar off to me, a skill that ovewhelms him….to me there’s balance in working together.
I love to dance with the women in my life, the co*creating genii and goddesses who have blown me away these past few years. We have a strong and ready community of people ready to build out the big dream, and I see the big dream. ManorMeta. It’s like a gleamy emerald city in my mind, the place where we will all have steady jobs for many years 
while creating the best possible world together. This is something I know that we can do, and all of the pieces are now coming into one place to allow that vision to come into the light.
It begins with one woman. Ama. A new type of model, slightly aloof but deeply connected, a rockstar turned scientist who questions everything and goes everywhere. She’s Annie Lennox and Angelina Jolie with a lot of Marie Curie, a chemist with knowledge of nanostructures and the universal connections between all of these things we are creating together. It takes these kinds of high level alchemists to lead new generations into great times of change.
ManorMeta opens the doors. My self-given job for the next year is to open as many doors as possible for groups to create new futures that reflect our highest good, our best selves, the public good we dream of when we allow ourselves to move beyond fear and boundaries. We will see families acknowledge their growth together through this universal collaborative work.
Opening doors, removing boundaries, vanquishing fear. Sounds like a rather knightly woman, or as firespinning teacher Ryan mentioned….”It’s time for you to be your warrior”. I’ve never liked war, but I am willing to find my fire if it will catalyze a new community to grow. The goddesses invited me to come spin staff with them on Monday nights, sounds like the right time to join in the dance and be the woman I’ve been waiting for.
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Menu Tuesday 7.8.8
